Because, why not?
Please welcome your judges! I love Jennifer but she looks a little “twee”, kittens. Randy has ink on his chin, he’s going to be so embarrassed tomorrow. Stephen Tyler is not letting being long in the tooth bother him – he just made it into a necklace.
First up, Casey. The producer told him to chill and be a little more constrained. Unfortunately, he only applied the advice to his hair. He growled his way through the entire song. Stephen loves it, Jennifer says there’s no one else like him on the radio now, which is supposed to be encouraging, and Randy says only Casey can do Casey. Meh. Solid B.
Thea tries to bring the heat. I can’t help feeling like I’m at a really good performing-arts school watching their year-end review. Does this girl have a soul? I think she needs to go out and live a little, make some bad choices, date some older men, get drunk and arrested, THEN try to sing. It might not help, but at least it will make her more relatable. At least to me. Jennifer says she scratched the surface and she’s going to have to pay for that, Randy was glad she’s stepping out, but she needs to dig deeper and move up, and Stephen is good. Him, yes, her – not so much. C.
Here comes Jacob. In a nod to Motown, Jacob is being accompanied by a dead, white guitarist. He actually delivers on this song, prompting Stephen Tyler to rush the stage and sing Hallelujah. Randy says Barry Gordy is saying OMG, and Jennifer says he made us beg for the notes. Ryan invites a group of girls to give him a hug, bringing his lifelong total of female body contact moments to three. He’s not my style, but everyone else seems to love him. A-.
Lauren comes out with confidence, looking like a million dollars. Zebra pelt is expensive! Stephen says she ripped it another beauty mark which makes about as much sense as anything else he’s ever said. Jennifer likes what she’s wearing and her neck movement. Umm, okay. Randy says she’s got her swagger on. Does anyone have anything to say about her singing? I think she’s still missing a spark, but her pitch was great. A-
Give it up for Stephano. He says he grew up listening to Motown then shows a family photo with someone playing the accordion. Stephano proves he can sing. And he proves he can keep his eyes open. He just can’t do them at the same time. Who cares, he sounded great! Jennifer calls him baby and wants to talk, he’s fine, he can sing, now he needs to connect. Randy agrees there’s no emotions. Stephen mumbles something about ramps. Whatever, he had me at hello. A.
Haley is singing You Really Got a Hold on Me. Jimmy Iovine tells her to “go for it.”. Wow, I can see why he’s so good at what he does. Has there ever been a more awkward staircase descent? I like her outfit, and she and Lauren obviously shared the hair straightener beforehand. Randy says the Haley he loved came roaring back YO, Stephen feels Randy and Haley and says she doesn’t look a day over fabulous. Good LORD, does he have a book of these hidden somewhere? I’ve never been one for book burning but I could be persuaded. Jennifer insults Stephen by comparing Haley’s voice to his. I think it’s her strongest performance so far. B+
Scotty brings the country to Motown. I think he’s another contestant that could benefit from a harder life. I like my country singers to look like they’re one DUI away from serious jail time. He sings For Once in My Life and the crowd goes wild. Stephen compares him to the King of Country – Glenn Campbell. Jennifer says it wasn’t his strongest performance, and Randy says he’s taking chances by doing the same thing week after week. I think he’s here for the long haul. B+
Pia sings another ballad. Joy. Well, she LOOKS the part of the star. I also like the fact that she’s one of the older contestants at 22. See what living a little can do for a person? Jennifer recycles her criticism of Stephano and tells her to stomp around, Randy loves her falsetto but is over the ballad, Stephen checks his cliche book and says she’s the closest star in the American Idol universe. Another A, but if she does a ballad next week I’m dropping her a letter grade on principle.
Paul says Motown music makes him move which is not a good sign. This song is one of my favorites – cause people DO say I’m the life of the party. Randy applauds the lack of dancing and says to bring the tender, Stephen compares him to Dillon and Willy Nelson, his dealers, and Jennifer says he’s the complete package. Ryan says he’s going for the “cougar” vote. It’s working. Love it – A.
Naima goes vintage funk with some serious bell-bottoms, its her most conservative outfit yet. She sounds on-key and in an effort to make Paul look like a good dancer, breaks into an African boogie. Stephen says she’s E to the Z to the Twiddly-dee. Someone needs to edit his comments into a 30 second PSA against drugs. Much more effective than Just Say No. Jennifer says she’s an exciting performer who gave her goose bumps, and Randy is glad ALL of her showed up. My friend, Mantamy, says she’s fearless. I agree – B+
James closes the show with a little Stevie Wonder. He’s finally found a song where screaming is appropriate. Jennifer says OMG over and over, and tells him he leaves her speechless which as we just saw is not true. Randy says the beginning was rough but it ended up being unbelievable. Stephen says it takes a little bit of crazy to make a difference in this world which could be debunked with one visit to my parent’s house. I think if I liked it, rock and rollers must be voting their fingers to the nub. Another A.
So either JD slipped some Paxil into my potatoes, or everyone really stepped up their game this week.
Bottom three – Thea, Naima and Haley, cause life ain’t fair. But I’d send Jacob home. He bores me.
What do you think?
10 thoughts on “THIS is an American Idol recap.”
Not particularly fond of Jacob either. Good singer, but not a style I like. I however don’t like your favorite either, go figure. Stephano would be my vote for going home but I doubt he will be. Thea or Naima probably will be going home, but you never know. Two girls have already left so maybe it is time for one of the boys to start packing. Bye Stephano!
If I was voting it would be for Scotty.
It’s difficult to like someone who doesn’t sing a style you enjoy. Mom loves Scotty cause he’s country. I’m SURE Sister likes James Durbin cause she’s hardcore. 🙂 I like Paul. Hmmm.
What do I think?? I think it’s no wonder our Country is in such sad shape….
New home sales were the lowest EVER last month, we are fighting two wars, we now have over 2000 Marines on the ground in Libya (what happened to “No boots on the ground?) in what looks to be the beginings of a THIRD war, our government plans to spend 1.3 TRILLION MORE than it takes in this year, violence at the Mexican border is continuing to escalate, 22 police officers have been shot and killed in the line of duty already this year (a record setting pace) and all the public cares about is which pimply faced teen can win American Idol and go on to a mediocre music career, or if Charlie Sheen and CBS can mend fences and get back to filming 2 & 1/2 Men.
That’s what I think.
I think you need some of my Paxil. But the good news is, according to Stephen Tyler, a little bit of what you’ve got can change the world!
I’m really not sure why I just wasted time ranking these, but I did. This is the first time that I’ve seen any of these contestants perform. It may also be the last time I see them! Here ya go:
Casey – This dude has some issues – and I think he may need a toilet by the look of his face throughout the song. Solid F
Thia – Surprised you had her rated so low. I thought she was average. Therefore, a C.
Jacob – Boring. Nearly missed the rest of the contestants because he almost put me to sleep. Good voice but not an ‘Idol’. D
Lauren – Not bad. Not great. Almost average. C-
Stephano – Limited vocals and kinda nasally. Thought he was decent but not the best. C-
Haley – Has a good voice. A little over-the-top on the performance. C+
Scotty – Eerily similar to Josh Turner. Simply don’t like the style and doesn’t fit the show. D
Pia – Definitely can hit the notes. C+
Paul – Solid performance…weak voice. C-
Naima – Surprisingly, she sounded good. If I didn’t have to watch she might’ve scored higher. B-
James – If you’re into that kinda thing. C
My top 10: Yours:
1. Naima t-1. Stephano
t-2. Pia t-1. Pia
t-2. Haley t-1. Paul
t-4. James t-1. James
t-4. Thia t-5. Jacob
t-6. Lauren t-5. Lauren
t-6. Stephano t-7. Haley
t-6. Paul t-7. Naima
t-9. Scotty t-7. Scotty
t-9. Jacob 10. Casey
11. Casey 11. Thia
Coach, be glad you started this week. Last week would have done you in for sure. While I liked Stephano, he’s not my fave. I’d buy a Paul McDonald tune today.
But you may be the Simon we’re looking for.
I think that A. G. & Coach need a dose of castor oil Very nasty attitude.
Man, Coach was right! There’s a first time for everything.
If all I thought about was all that’s wrong with our world, I couldn’t get out of bed in the morning! Thanks for giving me some welcome, light-hearted respite Zolligirl! I don’t want your blog to remind me of the heavy stuff – I RUN to it for a giggle (the chowing pigs was awesome!)!
What a results show! Wow. Although Casey’s reaction to the save brought tears to my eyes, I would have been OK to let him go and save the save.
Who else in the history of the show has had the guts that Naima has?! She won’t win, but I think the show is much more entertaining with her in it!
Also glad that Thia will live to sing another round. If she’s teachable and with some more maturity, I think she could be awesome.
THAT’S what I think. 😉