Moron Test Kitchen – Chilled Coffee Drink

Here’s how my brain works. “It’s hot, I’d like something cool. Oh man, remember that really good coffee drink I had that one time? I wonder how to make that. None of these recipes online are it, but here’s one that I can do since I have all of the ingredients. Some of the ingredients. Some stuff SIMILIAR to the ingredients.”

You are welcome to skip the rest of this post if you can see where this is going.

The recipe called for 1 cup of cold coffee, 1/3 cup of instant chocolate pudding, 1 cup of milk, 10 ice cubes, 2 tablespoons of cocoa, and hazelnut and sugar to taste.

Already I’m in trouble. Since I didn’t have hazelnut flavoring, I substituted hazelnut flavored COFFEE. And since I didn’t have milk, I used Vanilla Soy. And then I forgot the cocoa. Other than that I did well.

Except that when I read “1 cup of coffee”, I decided any cup would do, so I chose my cool INDIA mug which is about 16 ounces and that is apparently more than 1 CUP.

So we added more of everything else to the food processor. It might surprise you to know the recipe did NOT call for a food processor, it called for a BLENDER. Which I don’t have. Please pay no attention to the sponge soaking in goo in the background. That is not integral to this story.

Oh wait, I guess it is.

Pour the mixture in a cup.  Throw the top of the processor in the sink. Taste your drink and realize you forgot the cocoa, add it in, wash the top, start again.

Pour it into ANOTHER glass, add sugar, give up, forget to take a picture, and look out your window. What is that? Is that the top of a Starbucks??? Sit down and rethink your life.

Moron Test Grade – F.

I’m beginning to think I create unnecessary stress in my life.

6 thoughts on “Moron Test Kitchen – Chilled Coffee Drink

  1. I drank some really good iced coffee at your house – did someone else make it?

  2. I don’t remember how but you had made it for a study group so you must have a recipe.

  3. Didn’t I tell you last week that you create unnecessary stress in your life? Speaking of which, when do you want to pick up the boat?

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