It’s All About Me

Today is day FIFTEEN, which means I’m half way there! I’ve never done a juice/raw diet for this long and I have to say it’s paying off. I’ve actually lost 8 pounds! That’s the good news. The bad news will take considerable longer:

1. I’m kind of irritable. I feel good, and I’m not hungry, but dang I want some sugar. I went to WalMart over the weekend and bought some dates, then came home and inhaled them like they were cupcakes. They did not do the trick and I’m kind of difficult to be around right now.

2. My body is aggravated. I hadn’t had any detox issues until Sunday when my body decided to just say NO MORE. Which was awesome because I was getting ready to take the tennis court. Of course it was hot, and we had to play THREE SETS, and I was starving. I finally broke down and ate the only raw thing available – broccoli. Not the best idea but I managed to get off the court without embarrassing myself. Well, other than the whole playing thing.

3. I’ve discovered my husband is cruel. I’ve been telling people for years that I’m fat because my of HIM and it’s true. I’m losing weight in SPITE of him. Today, he brought home two pounds of shrimp. He and Moon ate fried shrimp IN FRONT OF ME, then he had the nerve to pull out a box of Girl Scouts cookies. Seriously, people have divorced for less!

4. I’m out of ideas. I’m sure that raw food fans know all kinds of tricks for turning raw carrots into a pizza crust but I’m struggling to find things to eat. This morning I had a banana and a spoon full of canned mushrooms. Yesterday I made a “sandwich” by putting guacamole on two pieces of lettuce and wrapping a slice of tomato. No wonder my body is saying “no thanks”.

Oh, well. 15 more days and this will all be over and I’ll be lighter, and that is what’s really important. Plus, with a skinnier body, I’ll be able to find a much NICER husband.



3 thoughts on “It’s All About Me

  1. I think husbands secretly want us to be fat so they can be really mean and they think who else would like a fat lady. The same way they want us to keep our hair long even though it looks bad.

  2. You just need a different definition of “raw”. My definition is “anything that hasn’t been microwaved” A stove is just heat. How can heat be bad for anyone? It. Can’t.

    Also, now that we have sunny weather, just place a sheet of aluminum foil on the dash of your car, place a few spoonfulls of cookie dough on it, go place tennis, enjoy delicious “raw” cookies on the ride home.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *