Ally McSqueal

Having a baby really threw me off my diet this week. Imagine what it would have been like if it had been MY baby. I dieted on Monday, fasted on Tuesday, Allison was born on Wednesday so I ate at LaParilla to celebrate, then on Thursday I had Five Guys Burgers and FRIES, and Friday I went to Taco Bell. So basically it’s HER fault. Before her, diet – after her, gasping as I put on my new pants that are a size larger than I have ever worn EVER.

My friend, K, who won’t accept that I am physically incapable of doing anything other than laying horizontally, invited me to meet her for a “walk”. I don’t know what walking means to you, but I was imagining a leisurely stroll as we caught up on each other’s lives. Alas, K is from MICHIGAN, where evidently walking means climbing a mountain straight UP as fast as you can. About half way through I remembered the time K had asked me to “bike” and it ended with me throwing up my breakfast banana. Good times.

Anyway, THIS didn’t end up like that at all. This ended with K laying hands on me and PRAYING me down the mountain. Seriously. She had to LAY HANDS on me and pray that I would make it down the mountain! She was very sweet about it, which makes the fact that I’m dumping her all that much harder. I’m sure she’ll be fine. There must be some goats she can pal around with.

4 thoughts on “Ally McSqueal

  1. I didn’t realize you were dumping me – and to learn of it on your blog! I thought we were just going to get pedicures the next time we met to catch up on each other’s lives.

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