I mention liquor a lot.

Yawn. I’m sitting on the couch wearing a pair of jeans and my pajama top, the same outfit I scrambled into this morning to take Moon to school. I almost went full pj’s but since I briefly considered running into WalMart to buy coffee, I spruced up a bit. I finally deemed WalMart too much effort and instead made a cup the old-fashioned way with a filter. K-cups should come by the ton, amiright?

JD had a job this morning, so the whole “get Moon to school” thing was up to me. I managed to not only get her up and dressed on time, I even made breakfast. I only had 3 hours to make all that happen, so it was a close call.

Then I weighed, fell on the floor and cried, said a few words that I won’t repeat, and rebelled against the diet god’s by eating a scrambled egg. With cheese! Yes, it was vegan cheese, but still.

Later I worked a BUNCH. Mother, you’ll be happy to know that I created 8 different ads, wrote copy for a website, approved proofs, and generally earned the high salary I’m paid. And by “high salary”, I mean “We’ve got Curtis Mathis and it’s all paid for.”

I was supposed to play bridge, but one of the foursome wasn’t feeling well, so she bailed. She also happens to be the YOUNGEST member of the bridge club, so I’m guessing the “migraine” she needed to nurse was actually a tall, cold margarita. I’m on to YOU, Carolyn!

Moon has finished two days of CRCT testing and says that she’s aced them so far. We have three more days to go, and after that, I don’t care if she ever cracks another book. 5th grade, it’s been real, now bu-bye. If an EMP ever hits the US and the only way to function in society involves dividing fractions, I’ll just find something to trade for help. I’m not collecting tiny liquor bottles because they save space! I wonder if Moon prefers vodka or whisky.

And now I’m going to trade these jeans for the pj bottoms that are laying on the floor at the foot of my bed where I left them this morning and soothe my bad back with a hot water bottle. And by “hot water bottle” I mean a glass of wine. But you probably guessed that already.

Tomorrow’s goal – wear pants AND a shirt.