When bored.

I took Moon to the doctor today for a check-up and she wouldn’t even let me LOOK at her, much less take her picture. I was reminded of a time when she was a little more amiable. The post below was originally posted Sept, 2009.


The Moonpie and I have a habit of being late for the eye doctor. It’s not my fault, really. They are just so darn far – 45 minutes away, and we only leave 30 minutes before the appointment. Okay, so it IS my fault.


And when the receptionist says they’ll still TAKE us, but only AFTER the other people, we just roll with it.


We kill time by playing the, “Who Can Make the Silliest Face and Most Annoying Noise” game.


It’s amazing how quickly they find a way to fit us in.

Hair today, gone tomorrow (7 years ago today)

(Freeda is still here and going strong. This blog however, seems to be winding down. I’ll try to find interesting content before we say good-bye.)

Sorry. It’s late.

Do you know what every summer for the last 7 years has been like? Sort of like working the janitorial shift at Hair Clips. THIS is what happens when the weather gets warm –

_mg_1678Huge clumps of hair fall out of my dog. The above brush was from ONE quick swipe over Freeda’s coat. The brush is unnecessary, anything  – petting, feeding, sleeping – will cause little hairy tumbleweeds to blow around my house. It’s as COOL as it sounds. I must sweep five times a day, and yet there’s always more. Until now.

That’s right, we FINALLY decided to take Freeda for a haircut.

_mg_1682This is JD explaining “Spa Day” to Freeda.

_mg_1684This is Freeda saying, “No Thanks.”

In my naivete, I thought we’d just stand there and watch. I SO wanted to document the whole process, but no, they sent us away and said to come back in FOUR hours. Yikes. Dogs are such divas.


We finally got the call that she was ready. Rachel couldn’t wait to see the result.


Whoo Hoo. Freeda couldn’t wait to see US.


Hey, where you going?


Uh..you got her Rachel?


Wow. She’s really in a hurry to show off her new “do”. It must be a girl thing.

Charleston, Baby!

This is one cool city. Seriously. It’s got everything – history, good food, the ocean, good food. Some things are so good they deserve a second mention. JD went to work while Moon and I explored the city. By “explore”, I mean we asked Suri to find us the nearest restaurant. This led us to Poogan’s Porch where we had yummy biscuits and BBQ sandwiches. Afterward, we walked through the famous City Market.  There was a ton of cool stuff, but we were blown away that everything is packed up each night and unpacked again each morning. We did buy a couple of gifts while we were there, but mainly we enjoyed just looking around.

Obviously, after such a hard day we had to go back to the room and nap. Traveling takes it out of a person, amiright Kittens? JD got home around 5:30 and by 7:00 we were ready to eat again. Amen Street Fish & Oysters was our destination and again, it was yummy. We stopped at the Moon Pie store on the way home so we’d have breakfast, and then all settled in for the night.

JD has to work again, and Moon and I are going to the aquarium and to tour an old dungeon, unless we get sidetracked by something important.  And by “important”, I mean delicious. But you probably knew that already.

Blast From The Past

I’ve decided that when I don’t have time to post something new, I’ll reach into the files for some oldies but goodies. Tonight, I didn’t have time to do even THAT. So I went over to my brother’s defunct blog and pulled out one of HIS greatest hits.

From: Lisa B****

To: Community

Subject: Vandal

I’m looking to identify the individual(s) who vandalized the rose at my mailbox. Any information would be appreciated.



To: Lisa B****

From: Ammo Guy

Subject: RE: Vandal


Could you please be more specific. I have vandalized dozens of mailboxes and roses in the last few weeks. There is no way I can be sure if I was able to vandalize yours without more details.

Was the rose dug up and replanted upside down? That’s a trademark of mine. I don’t do all of them that way, but if your rose is upside down, there’s a very good chance it was me.

Also, was he mailbox damaged in any way? I usually try to at least drill a few holes in the top of them, maybe fill it with concrete, but if I was in a hurry I may have just vandalized the rose. I don’t like to do things halfway, but I might have had several to do that night.

You know what, it might be easiest if you just email me a picture of the rose and mailbox. I will definitely recognize if it’s my doing. I take pride in my vandalizing and can I can always spot my work.

Looking forward to hearing from you,

Ammo Guy

PS: Is there a reward for this information?

Hey, it was just laying there, no one was using it!

Let me just say that the highlight of my day today was my trip to WalMart and that visit included me bumping my cart into a woman, a checkout line that suddenly quit working, and a new checkout line that had to stop while the receipt tape was changed. But I DID see my brother there, so that was fun.

I ran there to grab a few quick things for dinner. Moon woke up this morning with a fever, so I worked from home, and between her and Gitzo, I got almost nothing done. My house was a wreck and I didn’t really want to have clean the kitchen, THEN cook, then clean the kitchen again. Who DOES that?

At least my weekend was good. CPS managed to raise 94 THOUSAND dollars at the Walk on Saturday. Even though the goal was $100,000.00 I’d call it a success. Goals are notorious for being set too high, amiright Kittens? I am not going to quibble over such a small percentage. I often only achieve 70, maybe 80% of my goals and look at me – a part-time blogger!

Friday night before the Walk, I told Moon she could have a friend over. Saturday, by the time I’d finished getting everything back to the Center and helped count the money, I was too tired to take her friend home. Weekender, anyone? Because two 12 year old girls who are hyped up on soda and no sleep are just the BEST. By the time it was over, I was gently reminding them that school would be out soon and they wouldn’t see each other for a very LONG time, and they were seriously okay with that.

This is the part where I tell you how much weight I’ve gained since I stopped juicing, then go on to mention my NEW diet, but I’m too tired. So just know it’s going to be EPIC. And by “epic”, I mean I’ll be lucky to get to 70% of my goal.




It’s been some kind of week. I left town on Tuesday to go to Savannah. We have a new office there and I wanted to meet a new coworker, see the office, hang out on River Street, all of which I did. I even got to see my in-laws and a niece. It would have been awesome except for two things. One, I was still on the stupid RAW food diet so I didn’t get to fully enjoy all of the eating out opportunities, and Two -work. I’m not sure I’m cut out for it.

I was a little beat-down and depressed by the time I picked up Moon from school on Friday. Then it got worse. She was standing in the rain and when she got in the car, I asked why she didn’t go stand under an umbrella with one of the other kids. That’s when she said that she had tried, but they had closed ranks and left her out. I am a woman on the edge, PEOPLE. Then she said that she hadn’t gotten a Friday snack because she didn’t have a quarter and no one would share their “good behavior” cards with her. Why doesn’t SHE have “good behavior” cards? That is THE question. Moon says even though she helps her homeroom teacher put up chairs every day, she never gives her one. What the what! You mean people are ugly and you work to do good things and no one notices? Guurrrl, I can relate!

I had already planned to take Moon shopping for an Easter outfit, so off we went for a little retail therapy, then we called Dad to meet us for dinner because who wants to eat my cooking when the world is already so unhospitable?

Saturday, I stayed in bed until noon and watched back to back Heroes on Netflix, then I went to play tennis. I’m guessing the Lord wishes Sharon and I would start practicing more and leave him alone because we PRAYED nonstop the whole time. And we won BIG. Whatever works, amiright Kittens?

Sunday was GREAT, and also awkward. Great because my lovely niece, Brooke, got baptized! Awkward because JD and I decided to have an argument at the lunch afterward. I’m not sure why, but if I had a chart of all of our fights over the last 17 years, 90% would be on Sundays. Anyway, we went to church, had lunch with AmmoGuy and family and Bratt and Kit, hung out, sent the kids kayaking, and ate.

Jesus cheated death and I decided to cheat my diet. Yes, 20 days into my juice/raw fast, I caved. I had some egg casserole AND ham. I didn’t go all-in and eat bread or sugar, but still it was a failure. A DELICIOUS failure.

Now the week begins and it’s time to go back to work, eat raw food, and send Moon into the Hades on Earth known as “Public School.” At least one of us will have a better week. The only thing Moon will have to worry about on Friday is walking. Her pockets are going to be so full of quarters she’ll sound like a wind-chime when she moves.