Arggh!

Zolligirl was offline all day yesterday. At first I thought so many people wanted to see JD dance that it had crashed my server, but alas, it was just a server upgrade issue.

Sooo, the Give-a-way will continue until midnight TONIGHT. Just scroll down, past the New Kids on the Block, to the Giveaway post, and leave a comment. The random number generator will pick a number and hopefully, it will be yours!

Good Luck!

India Will Never Be the Same

JD went to INDIA. Are you wondering if he loved it? Let’s put it this way, the ENTIRE family wore kurtas to church today.

There’s a ton of great stories, but one my favorites that involve the kids happened at the end of the week. JD was lucky enough to be in India when one of the kids turned 13. They always have a BIG celebration for the 13th, and all of the other kids prepared dances. As the night progressed, the adults were asked if THEY had prepared anything.

That is up for debate. Judge for yourself.

I had no idea my husband was such a great dancer! This could be the start of something new for my family. Or not.

By the way, don’t forget to comment on yesterday’s post. The 25 bucks is up for grabs!

Zolligirl is Feeling Generous – A Giveaway

JD has been in India for the past two weeks, but he is coming home in the wee hours of the morning! I didn’t write about his trip because it’s a well known fact that Hell’s Angels’ peruse the internet looking for frumpy, middle-aged women, home all alone to ravish. It’s true, I saw a movie about it once.

The point is that JD is coming home and I’m happy. So I’m having a Zolligirl GIVEAWAY!

Last week I finished the Bible, and immediately began to read everything I could get my hands on. Now I’m looking for a new book. Post a comment (ONE per person) saying what YOU want to read, OR suggest a book for me. That’s it. I’ll use the random number generator to pick a winner and some lucky person will get a $25.00 gift certificate to Amazon. This ends Monday at midnight, so tell your friends!

These Are the Days of Our Lives

Don’t you think it’s odd that a gallon of milk and a gallon of gas cost approximately the same? Cows must be a lot more difficult to milk than I’ve been led to believe. I was thinking about this today while driving JD’s van. About a year ago, he replaced the fuel pump which works WONDERFULLY until you get below a quarter of a tank, then I’ve been instructed to never park on a hill. Awesome. So today, when I finally found a parking spot on the square, I was worried that the incline might prove disastrous. Side note: I don’t normally say things like “prove disastrous”, but I’m watching Masterpiece Theatre as I write this. Anyway, the van started with a bang, then puttered and threatened to quit, FORCING me to floor it, run two red lights, and squeal tires getting to the gas station. Where I bought gas. Was that a suspenseful story or what?

Kinda like watching American Idol to see who got the boot. Paul? PAUL? Cute, white-toothed, scratchy-voiced Paul? What is WRONG with America? My prediction – Lauren Alaina for the win. The others are too boring or crazy to win. You heard it here 375th!

Speaking of hearing, this morning Moon was having trouble putting on her tennis shoes. Finally, she looked up at me and yelled, “STINKING HELL!” I was slightly taken aback at her demeanor, (thanks MasterP). Um, what?  “I said, I can’t get this stinking HEEL to go in my shoe.” Whew, I was worried there for a second. Worried she’d picked up some language from Tania-the-Mad!

Speaking of old stuff, I REALLY love Masterpiece Theatre. I meant to tivo Downton Abbey, but somehow it started recording all of the shows. A new version of Upstairs/Downstairs was on the other day and it was SO good. Made me wish I had lived in the thirties. UPstairs, of course.

Well, that’s all for now. Eleanor Dashwood is calling and I gather Marianne has made her infatuation for Willoughby well known and now is considered damaged goods. It’s quite the scandal!

American Idol’s Songs of the Cinema

Here come the judges! But first, a recap of the terribly shocking, most shocking elimination ever – Pia goes home. Shocking. Except probably to the puppet-master Jimmy Iovine who signs her right away to his record label. Then we’re treated to some fun with JLo, as she was recently named The World’s Most Beautiful Woman. She looks totally embarrassed by the attention. And by “embarrassed” I mean orchestrated the whole thing.

First up – Paul sings Old Time Rock n Roll. Why is Will. I. Am back? Let’s hope Gwen Stefani isn’t. Jimmy suggest he come out in his underwear. I think that’s the BEST idea I have heard in a long time. Unfortunately, he’s back in the Rose Bowl Parade suit. Stephen inquires of the sax player and compliments his suit, JLo says he’s getting more polished each week, and Randy says we’ve just witnessed the first number at the Paul McDonald concert. I love Paul but this just feels LAME. Like the kind of performer you book at the nursing home. He should have stuck with the underwear idea. Definite C-

Who’s up? Lauren says she’s doing a Miley Cyrus tune which provides the awesome moment where Jimmy Ioving tells her she sings BETTER than Miley. Don’t they have to get her permission to USE the song? Then they slam her? Excellent. This is followed by the advice to steal Pia’s votes. Man, those guys are sweet, kinda makes me wish I was in the music business. I love Lauren, but while she may have a better voice than Miley, she’s got about 10 percent of the personality. JLo says she needs to push further, Randy says she’s roaring back and Stephen says he’s moved beyond tears. I’ve moved beyond Stephen.  Good, not great to me, but she looks gorgeous. Solid B.

Stefano is singing a Boys to Men tune from Boomerang. Hope that doesn’t come back to hurt him. Get it? Come back? There’s a reason there’s no advertisements on this blog. Randy says he slayed it, Stephen says he really knows how to milk a song, and JLo says he obviously followed her awesome advice and it was great. I think he’s got the same problem Pia had, totally devoid of charisma. I give him a B.

Next up, Scotty. He says he wants to go BACK to his country roots. Yeah, cause I’ve totally been confusing him with the rocker dude lately. So a George Strait song? I like the song, I like the movie, but Scotty’s version – sucks by comparison. Stephen says it’s great, JLo says it’s great, Randy mixes it up and says, “Dude, it’s great.” Do these judges ever listen to any GOOD music? Blah, blah, blah a solid C.

Casey brings the bass and does Nat King Cole despite Jimmy Iovine IMPLORING him not to. Why do they even have a mentor? Right away, I’m thinking it’s a bit creepy. And weird. Here’s a shock – the judges LOVE it. JLo hopes we get it, Randy says he loves how “educational” this season is, Stephen says his mama used to sing that song to him as a child. It explains so much. Obviously I’m not sophisticated enough to get it. Hated it.  C-

Haley sings Blondie. Is it me or is that dress really short? If I’m distracted wondering if she’s going to accidentally show us the fine china, how are MEN watching this? Randy says he didn’t love it, Stephen agrees with Randy then makes a creepy comment about looking up her “address”, and JLo says it wasn’t the best. I actually LIKE it. Either they are crazy or I am, and my money is on the three with easy access to barbiturates. B+

After a strange shot of Rob Reiner sitting next to Elvira, we move on to Jacob. Jimmy gives him a slap down about last week’s preaching to the viewers. “People don’t want to be preached to.” It’s true. I just go to church for the free coffee. Right away W.I.A and Jimmy hate the song he’s chosen and talk him into singing Bridge Over Troubled Water. First impression – FINALLY.  A subdued Jacob is much better than a crazed, here-I-sing-low, here-I-scream-loud Jacob. I think it’s his best performance in a very, very, long time. Stephen is bleeped out which is the highlight of my night, MORE please, JLo says he’s a gifted vocalist, and Randy loves that he took his time with it and that it was perfect. It had oomph to it – Best so far. Solid A.

Now a little something from James. He wants to do Sammy Hagar which Jimmy hates. That makes all of us. The most entertaining part of this is watching the contestants blow off Jimmy Iovine. James wants to showcase Metal which includes having some scary, looking dude on guitar that I won’t feel bad about not knowing no matter how awesome they say he is. Still wouldn’t open my door if he were outside needing directions. Where was I? Metal never has, nor ever will, be my thing. JLo says it felt real, Randy says we were all at a a Durbin concert, and Stephen says it was outstanding. I think it was great Metal, if you like that sort of thing. A-.

Okay, now it’s your turn. What did you think? Who’s going home tomorrow? I say Casey is in trouble again. Until tomorrow –

Lisa. I. Be.

Wednesday

I recognize that this is supposed to be a Weight Watcher’s Wednesday, but since last week was Spring Break, also known as the Meat Lovers Buffet at M on the Mountain’s, I thought I’d give my scale a break.

This morning I sent Moon off with a hearty breakfast and a prayer, then came home and dressed for a day at the office. That’s right, I went INTO the office for a meeting. It’s true, I wore dress pants and carried a briefcase! The Owner/President of the company just happened to be visiting and when he walked in and saw me, he did an actual double take and said, “Hey, I haven’t seen you in years!” which I’m pretty sure is code for “Man, didn’t I fire you a long time ago?”

Then I took a friend to lunch, visited the printer, and picked up Moon from school where she declared the first day of CRCT testing was a “piece of cake.” Whew.

I had a lot of work to do today, yet I still managed to finish the 2nd book of the Hunger Games triology. I used my Nook and held it so long and so tight that I’ve stressed my right hand to the point I can’t turn a doorknob. If you don’t see me in a few days, send help!

We finished the day with prayer at church where several people talked about God and love and doing good works for the poor, and I talked about DEATH and how it could happen any second, so PRAY NOW.

I think I have post-spring-break-stress disorder. The only cure – bed rest. And the third book of The Hunger Games.

My Brother Saves the Day

I have internet. I have television. Seriously, what two better sentences exist in the world? My brother came over after a long day of work and fixed my TV by bypassing the black box, then unplugging the red, yellow, and white cables from the OTHER black box, and finally, moving a cable from input two to input three. Voila! The internet was simpler – he replaced the router. Then replugged a whole bunch of cables into it. The point is – this blog is the result of his hard work so blame him.

So I finally finished the Bible. I started it before Christmas so I didn’t exactly breeze through it, but I did it in less than a year, so whoo hoo for me. I’m sure God is throwing a party that after 40 years of reading YA and Historical Romances, I finally made it through the BIBLE. My vow was to read no other books until I had finished it and I didn’t. My new vow? No more vows! I am planning on starting over now, and reading it at my leisure. Oh, and also catching up on 6 months of reading YA and Historical Romances. Speaking of which – I bought and read The Hunger Games today. Yes, in one day, don’t judge me. It was AWESOME and the piles of clothes on the floor will just have to wait.

Tomorrow I’ll be too busy praying to pick up clothes as it’s CRCT day at Moon’s school – the TEST that determines whether or not she can go into 4th grade. One of the women in my Moms in Touch group said her son is worried because his teacher told the class, YOU SHOULD BE SCARED. How awesome would it have been if one of the kids and said, “I REBUKE you. The Lord did not give us a spirit of fear, woman! Get thee behind me Satan!”

Well, I think it would be cool. But maybe I should wait a day or two before I start reading the Bible again.

Monday Randomness

1. If you are reading this, it’s a miracle. Well, that might be too strong of a word, but it’s still pretty lucky, since I came home to NO internet or TV. My phone is a mobile hotspot, but it’s sketchy at best. Spending hours on the phone with DirectTV and Comcast asking me to unplug and replug my electronic devices is not as much fun as they seem to think.

2. The other night I had a dream that Pixar and Disney were having a movie fight and I woke up and my first conscious thought was ,”SCREW YOU, DISNEY!” It may have something to do with the fact that I took Moon and RimFire to see Hop over Spring Break.

3. At my parents, we were watching this news report about a woman who had a botched eye-lift and now she can’t close her eyes. My brother said, “She’s got a great future as a night watchman.” Pray for him.

4. I’m SO close to finishing the bible. I’m on December 8th. I might even finish tonight what with the no internet and no television. Good one, God.

5. I think my legalistic background is affecting my daughter. When we came home to no television and no internet she said, “It’s because we missed church today.” I was like, “NO it’s not. Geesh. It’s because you didn’t clean your room!”

6. My dad took me to the co-op and put two new tires on my van, AFTER he filled it up with gas. I’m not sure which one was the most expensive.

7. Because my dad was so nice, I took a picture of his baby.

8. My mom was nice too, but I’m too tired to blog anymore. Such is the life of a mom – very little reward. Except for that website I worked on all weekend for her.

9. Not that I’m keeping score. Me: 10, Tania-the-Mad: 0

American Idol – Hall of Fame or Walk of Shame?

Welcome to the Rock n Roll edition of AI. Stephen Tyler wearing a shiny suit gives us a tour of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Man, when I fall out of love with someone, I fall OUT of love. I’m sure he would find this heartbreaking on every level. This week brings two new elements to the show – Gwen Stefani styles the contestants and Will I. Am joins Jimmy Iovine in giving musical advice. I predict he’ll be Well I. Giveup by the end of the show.

Jacob sings Man in the Mirror because it’s more of who he is. If he goes home it’s not because he sang the song bad? Uh, yeah, it is. I thought it started strong, but seemed a little sharp on a couple of notes. Or flat,whatever, it was OFF, okay? Stephen said it was beautiful, JLo said it was perfect in every way, and Randy said it was hot. Blah, Blah, Blah. B-

Haley decides to sing Janis Joplin’s Take a Little Piece of My Heart. Well, I like her shoes. I guess if they’re going to bring in a celebrity stylist I can free to comment. The singing? I’m not loving it. Sorry, it just seems like karaoke. JLo says she’s a contender and she’s going to be around for a minute. We can only hope. Randy likes the bluesy rock, cool run, and Stephen can’t find anything wrong with it. That’s shocking, Stephen, you’re usually so harsh. No star power. Solid C.

Casey sings my favorite – Credence Clearwater Revival’s, Have You Ever Seen the Rain. Right away I am loving the bass. I am NOT loving the growl. He’s freaking me out a little with the high notes to low growl range thing, but over all I like it. Randy says CCR would be proud and that he has made the upright bass cool, Stephen says put wheels on it and ride it around town, and JLo says she’d pay top dollar to be in the front row. Not my favorite performance of his. B-.

Lauren does Aretha. As she walks out, I want to smack Gwen Stefani. Really, you want to put a bigger girl in checked shorts? Ugg. I think she hits all of the notes, but she’s still missing a little something behind the eyes. I’m not sure what Stephen said but it sounded like she’s “bloated up”, which is the SHORTS. JLo says she’s amazing, and Randy isn’t jumping up and down, but calls it good. Solid B.

James sings While My Guitar Gently Weeps. I’m typing and listening and I think he sounds meh. I know he hit that high note and I’m supposed to get excited but I just can’t. JLo says the pain deep inside him is special to watch, Randy loved the emotional side, Stephen loves that he weeped along with the guitar. Man, whatever they were paying Simon was too little.  B.

Next up, Scotty. He’s taking on Elvis’s That’s Alright, Mama. Here’s the truth, if I can stop from looking at him and his hunchback way of singing, I like it! Randy says he is in it to win it, Stephen says something but does it matter? JLo says he’s even got flavor! It’s my favorite performance so far. Solid A.

Right away, two things hit me. Pia is NOT doing a ballad and she’s wearing a Dalmatian. Gwen, what the what? Yeah, yeah, she hits the notes. Still devoid of soul to me, but whatever. Stephen says she’s inspiring men to drink, JLo says she can sing up tempo but she needs to research great performers, and Randy says she delivered. Reluctantly, an A.

Stefano sings When A Man Loves a Woman. I want to like him, I really do, but he just doesn’t do it for me. I think my issue is that while he, and Pia for that matter, are good technically, they just don’t bring the soul with them.  JLo says it was beautiful,  Randy said the first part was jerky, and Stephen says he nailed it. I’m giving him an A-. I don’t know why. I think they’ve lulled me into a coma.

Finally, Paul sings Johnny Cash and brings down the house! Randy says he loved it, Stephen says he loved it, and JLo says SHE loved it. Guess what? I loved it. My favorite of the night! A+ cause the boy has personality!

I predict Haley is going home. My mom says Jacob. Dad, channeling Stephen Tyler, says he hates to see any of them go. So, make your predictions now!

Weight Watchers, what?

As much as I’d love to get on the scale right now, I’m on Spring Break and my idea of dieting is to have a beer every OTHER day. Yesterday I photographed two small children, and today I didn’t. I’ll leave you to guess which day ended with a beer.

Because I wake up at four every morning as the first of way too many dogs starts asking for breakfast, I am ready for bed. So here’s a few shots from the Tennessee Vacation.

Hiding in the basement as the storm closes in. See, it’s right above us!

Moon was prepared to spend the night, but luckily it didn’t come to that.

Cousin RimFire magically appeared today and I saw them for about two seconds in total as they ran from the sandbox to the closet full of vintage clothes to the 90+ acres.

Grandmothers are good on any given day, but a Grandmother with a house full of vintage clothing is awesome. A Grandmother who repeatedly says, “Why do you keep asking for your mother to get things for you? You need to ask ME.” Well, there are no words.