A lesson on why I coupon –

There haven’t been a lot of posts lately on couponing because I’ve gotten lax with my shopping. I was on a diet and busy and lazy and the next thing you know, our surplus has dwindled down to nothing but butter and mustard. I’m trying to get my mojo back, so I gathered my coupons for the week and hit Publix.


This first photo is what I bought because it was A) on sale, and B) I could match it with a coupon. It’s also stuff we like, so that helps. The grand total for 5 boxes of pretzels, 2 loaves of garlic bread, 6 boxes of pasta and 1 multi-pak of gum was $5.25 cents. Not bad.


But then I had to pick up a few things without coupons. The pasta sauce was B1G1, and while they said there was a coupon, I couldn’t find it. The same thing with the soap. The chocolate morsels and whipping cream are for a Moron Test Kitchen post tomorrow. Grand Total for 2 jars of sauce, morsels, cream, and 2 packs of soap? $9.30

So, what have we learned? Carbs are cheap. No wonder I’m fat.

I’m Famous and Influential

There are days when I feel like a nobody just hanging out here in the suburbs. Just kidding, I NEVER feel like that. I feel awesome and important, and today I have proof that I am.

First, my mother-in-law sent me an article from her local newspaper. Seems that they did a little profile on yours truly.


Profile might be too strong of a word, but my name was in the story caption. And they spelled it correctly! Never mind that I look like I weigh 312 pounds, the important thing is that of all the people they could have chosen for the story, they chose ME. And my partner who just happened to be the daughter of Al Decker, the person for whom they named the tournament.

As if that wasn’t enough to get my head spinning, this was ALSO in today’s mail.


That’s right, a personal letter from Mr. 41 himself. Our newly elected Senator, Scott Brown says my “contribution was instrumental” in getting him elected, lowering your taxes, and basically keeping you safe from terrorism. You have me and my massive contribution to thank. And it was MASSIVE. Do you have any idea how far $25.00 dollars will go at a yard sale?

I’m expecting to receive an invitation to Washington at any moment. Or at least an autographed copy of Cosmo, whichever.

I steal ideas

Hey, when it comes to Homeschooling – all’s fair in love and war! I found this on another blog, thought I’d try it, and since it seems to be working, am passing it along.

One of the things we struggle with, is getting the MoonPie to finish her work on a timely basis. Sometimes she whips through her worksheets like her pencil’s on fire, other times she can spend a hour doodling in the margins.

Enter the Bingo Card.


Now, I hand her a worksheet, and we negotiate how long it should take. She says 2 hours, I say 10 minutes and we meet somewhere in the middle. Then I go to an Online Stopwatch site and start the countdown. If she finishes in time, she gets to put a sticker on a square. Once it’s covered, we’re heading to Build-a-Bear, or Sparkles, whatever floats her boat.

She’s been getting her schoolwork done quickly, and it’s shown me how fast she can go when properly motivated.

It doesn’t, however, seem to work on husbands. But then again, what does?

Don’t answer that.

Zollicoffer – it’s real y’all!


Zollicoffer is a real place, although unless you grew up there, you might be hard pressed to find it. Only a handful of families live in the unincorporated area, and I’m sure there are local people who don’t even know where it is. I wanted to give you some statistics about it, but until this highly successful blog puts it on the map, we’ll have to use those of the closest town – Livingston, TN.

Estimated median household income in 2008: $27,582 (it was $23,309 in 2000)

Livingston: $27,582
Tennessee: $43,614

For population 25 years and over in Livingston

  • High school or higher: 60.8%
  • Bachelor’s degree or higher: 12.9%
  • Graduate or professional degree: 4.5%
  • Unemployed: 6.2%
  • Mean travel time to work: 19.5 minutes

Most common occupations for females:

  • Building and grounds cleaning and maintenance occupations (8%)
  • Textile, apparel, and furnishings workers (6%)
  • Secretaries and administrative assistants (6%)
  • Cashiers (5%)
  • Information and record clerks except customer service representatives (5%)
  • Other production occupations including supervisors (5%)
  • Assemblers and fabricators (4%)
  • Crime in Livingston by Year – 2008



    per 100,000




    per 100,000




    per 100,000




    per 100,000




    per 100,000




    per 100,000


    Auto thefts


    per 100,000




    per 100,000


    City-data.com crime index (higher means more crime, U.S. average = 320.9)



    and finally:

    Livingston-area historical tornado activity is slightly above Tennessee state average. It is 91% greater than the overall U.S. average.

    There you have it. – The fact that I’m not a white supremacist using my power as a maintenance supervisor to run a crime syndicate is in itself a miracle. But honestly, despite everything the people of Zollicoffer are on average very kind and giving. It must be the constant fear of tornadoes.

    The Judges are Tough


    The contestants were nervous. They only had a few moments to form their groups and pick their songs.


    They sang ballads. They rocked out.


    “Back row, you’re through to the next round. Front row, it’s the end of the line.”


    Some didn’t take it so well. Security was called.


    Hollywood, it’s a cruel town.

    Holy Sunday

    I’ve just started a new Beth Moore study – Stepping Up, a journey through the Psalms of Ascent.

    The Psalms of Ascent consist of Psalms 120 through 134, and these 15 psalms are traditionally associated with the pilgramage of Israel to Jerusalem for the three yearly feasts. Recall that the people of Israel were scattered throughout the near East (often referred to as the “Diaspora”) and were required by the Law (Torah) to return to Jerusalem three times a year for the “Three Great Feasts” as described in Deuteronomy 16:16. “Three times a year all your males shall appear before the LORD your God at the place that he will choose: at the Feast of Unleavened Bread, at the Feast of Weeks, ad at the Feast of Booths.” (ESV)

    The 15 psalms are commonly associated with the 15 steps of the temple leading from the Court of Women (the furthest place that women were allowed to advance within the temple) to the Nicanor Gate that led to the Court of the Israelites. We can rejoice that, although the women were prevented from further approaching the Holy of Holies in the Jewish temple, we have full freedom in salvation through Jesus Christ to boldly approach the throne of our God!

    I’m only on week 2, but I LOVE Psalm 121.

    Psalm 121

    A song of ascents.

    1 I lift up my eyes to the hills—
    where does my help come from?

    2 My help comes from the LORD,
    the Maker of heaven and earth.

    3 He will not let your foot slip—
    he who watches over you will not slumber;

    4 indeed, he who watches over Israel
    will neither slumber nor sleep.

    5 The LORD watches over you—
    the LORD is your shade at your right hand;

    6 the sun will not harm you by day,
    nor the moon by night.

    7 The LORD will keep you from all harm—
    he will watch over your life;

    8 the LORD will watch over your coming and going
    both now and forevermore.

    I’m in the process of memorizing it – it’s nice to be reminded that the LORD is watching over me.

    Enjoy your Sunday.


    Moron Test Kitchen – Snow Cream

    I haven’t made this since I was a little girl in Z-Town. I had to call my sister to get the recipe. This is what she said:

    Snow, vanilla, sugar and milk.

    She’s very busy and couldn’t be bothered to give exact measurements. Luckily, I called my best-friend Google. Google loves me. She always there for me.  Where were you when I was growing up, Google? When I needed a friend, a kind ear? It could have been so different.

    Whatever. Let’s start with snow.


    I have a “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy when it comes to snow. I don’t want to know where you got it, I just need a bowl full of the stuff, preferably white. Let’s not dwell on air pollution, or germs, and for pete’s sake don’t mention the DOGS.


    To 1 gallon of snow, Google said to add 1 cup of sugar…


    1 tablespoon of vanilla extract…


    2 cups of milk…


    and stir until creamy. Enjoy.


    Awww. Look at that smile. Moron Test Grade: A! The taste was yummy and the experience was fun. It was a little chilly for dessert, but I’m going to remember this recipe. It will be awesome in July.

    Conversation with the MoonPie


    Me: I can’t believe you’re eight. You’ll be twelve, then sixteen, then going off to college and getting married. You’re going to leave me and I can’t take it!

    MP: Mama. I’m not going to leave you. I’m not going to get married, and I want to be HOME-colleged. You and dad can teach me.

    Me: Really? You won’t move off and live with Brooke and Jemi, and get your own apartment, and drive around town and stay up late?

    MP: Oh. You made that sound really fun. I guess I will.

    Feel better about your own livingroom


    What can I tell you? This has been a CRAZY week. Work/school/Valentines have undone us. If my mother loved me at all, she’d come clean this mess. And the one in the spare bedroom. And do the laundry. Why, Mom? Why don’t you love me??

    Did I mention there’s a yard sale this weekend? Not that you can go, you’ll be busy cleaning, but I promise to keep a look out for anything you might like.

    How the Super Bowl Commercial could have been Funnier



    This commercial annoyed me. You’ve got Dave on the right who never met a conservative he didn’t hate. Oprah, who isn’t satisfied with telling me what to buy for Christmas and what to read, but has now expanded into telling me how to vote. And Jay “Give me back my show” Leno. As I have mentioned, I’m firmly on Team COCO.

    I get how some stupid people might have found the commercial funny, but I thought they went for the cheap laugh. With a little thought, I’m sure they could have thought of a way to make it funnier.


    I did.