He works hard for the money

My husband is a good photographer. Which helps, since that’s like his JOB. Most people don’t really understand what he does when he says “corporate photography”, but basically he goes places and shoots for magazines, in-house publications, annual reports, corporaty things.

It’s a stressful and demanding profession. Like yesterday, he had to go to a Braves game. Do you KNOW how scary Atlanta traffic is?

Here’s one of the shots –

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It was to show how Coke is good for the environment by providing lots of plastic bottles for recycling. Recycling wouldn’t be nearly as successful without all of those used bottles lying around. (Or laying around, I like to cover my bases.) Coke has been very good to us, so I don’t care if they bottle it in nuclear waste containers and throw it in the Chattahoochie. Which they DON’T , of course.

But I hear Pepsi does. True story.

Zoo Crew

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We saw elephants.

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We brushed pigs and goats.

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We observed loud and boisterous gorillas.

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And posed (looking fashionable and cute) with every statue we saw.

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And we saw a LOT of statues.

Save your eyes

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and your brain. Read another blog.

Rachel’s teacher recently told me that she enjoys reading my blog, but for the other extreme she goes to www.AHolyExperience.com. The other extreme? Our blogs aren’t even on the same planet. She writes beautiful, lyrical prose about finding God in the everyday. I write snarky posts about my crazy family. So give your brain cells a treat and check it out. Then come back here, (as Rachel’s teacher says, “for the real world”).

I don’t think that’s a compliment.

Lisa 6-Pack

This is day one of PX90 – the totally awesome, kick booty workout regime as seen on TV. My nephew sent me the dvd’s because he thinks I’m fat. Well, he didn’t SAY that, but why else would he send them? Exactly. So anyway, after 90 days, I should look like this:

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I’m not sure what she’s drinking, but if it’s straight up vodka and it’s helping her look like that, you should get used to me slurring my words.

To properly document the 90 days, I thought I’d post a picture of me in my current state, you know..so later we’ll see how far I’ve come.

WARNING: Only scroll down if you have a strong stomach.

This is your last warning!

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90 days might be a tad short. Man, I really hope it’s the vodka.

A Birthday Shout-out

As is the Zolligirl tradition – there are no sardonic posts on sentimental holidays or birthdays. Which is very hard for me, especially since the birthday girl is…Tania the mad my sister.

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Awww. How sweet! My parents bought her shoes…I wonder what those felt like. Anyway..for my sister, here are three things you might not know about her.

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1. She’s good at anything she does. It’s true..she paints, she’s crafty, she can decorate and cook AND manage a business with a lot of employees.  She’s a great mom, loves her parents, showers the nieces and nephew with gifts, and is a top-notch Mother-in-law (and I know something about good Mother-in-laws), and a super grandmother. She’s also athletic. You could throw her into Dale Hollow Lake right now with a ski-rope and a piece of plywood and she’d be turning circles and jumping waves backwards before you could get on your sunscreen. A lesser person might find that annoying.

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2. She REALLY likes Christmas. It’s her favorite holiday. As kids, we had a fake Christmas tree with a plastic pipe running up the back  and connected to an angel. Snow would fall from beneath her dress, land in the cardboard tree skirt and head back up for hours of snowy fun. Tania now has one in her collection. And I do mean COLLECTION..she has approximately 75. Little ones, big ones, white, green, aluminum..and they get decorated. With handmade bows. When we draw names at Christmas, everyone wants her to get theirs! She has no control when it comes to Christmas and we like it.

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3. She’s always been really PRETTY, but never seemed to figure it out. Her husband, in an attempt to keep her in the dark, moved her to a tiny, coal mining town. He was hoping no one would find her and clue her in, but it only serves to make her look even better. Have you seen those documentaries about people in Appalachian towns?? She could lose three teeth and still be voted Miss Coal Miner at the Virginia State Fair. To be fair, these documentaries try hard to find the worst looking people. I know for a fact that some of the people she works with have teeth. Okay, Bertha does, but other than that I couldn’t promise.

I give her a hard time because that’s how we Zolligirls roll. But truthfully, she’s pretty dang awesome. Oh, here’s a fourth thing –

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despite my penchant for  sarcasm, jokes, and goofy pictures – I’ve always looked up to her. And I always will.

Happy Birthday, Sister. I love you!

Feel better about your own life pt.2

Say you came to our house, unannounced and found us gone. And say you decided to just go on in and check on things. You’d more than likely see little clothing vignettes  like this scattered about…

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Do not be alarmed, the Rapture has not taken place, you weren’t left behind. That’s just how we roll. And WHY would you come unannounced and just walk in to someones house?? That’s creepy, you should probably leave.  Or clean-up, that works too.

For my mom.

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Because I may have, on occasion, given my mother a hard time on this blog, I thought I’d take a moment and mention some of the things I love about her. While there are THOUSANDS of great things I could write about, I’ve narrowed it down to three.

1. She doesn’t care what people think.

How awesome would that be?  Imagine the freedom! One Christmas, my sister decided to buy my mother a pair of white, wooden deer to put on the front lawn. My parents owned a Bed & Breakfast at the time right in the center of town. Months later I was in town to plan my wedding and found that the deer were still in the front yard. When a friend asked if the deer would be taken down in time for the wedding, I answered, “of course!” Uh….that’s not what SHE heard. She heard from some ladies around TOWN that the deer were permanent residents. I ran straight to my mother to let her know the WHOLE town was talking about her and the Christmas deer and the fact that they were still in the yard and this was JULY and that I would be holding my wedding reception there in two months! So she did what anyone would do under the circumstances. She had a seamstress make a bow-tie for one and a veil for the other. My mother doesn’t let a little thing like small town gossip get her down. Now THAT is cool.

2. She has low expectations.

I have a good friend with three children. Every single one of them is crazy successful…taking her and her husband on all-expense-paid trips to Hawaii successful. She’s very proud of them. But my mother is just as proud of us.  I’ve heard her tell her friends,  “I have good kids. Not ONE of them is on drugs or in jail.”  I have to say it’s taken a lot of pressure off. If I can avoid Meth and incarceration, I’ve made my mother happy. Well done, Mom, well done.

3. She’s funny.

Okay, not USUALLY on purpose, but she has the wonderful ability to laugh at herself. With a family like ours, it’s a good trait. Cause we LOVE to tell Mother stories. Like the time she told us how she kept her new car so clean – SOS pads. I can still see the look on my dad’s face.  We tell that story at least once at every family get-together and she always laughs good naturally. Then she threatens to tell stories on us. Or get her own blog. But not taking yourself or really ANYTHING too seriously is a good way to get through the the craziness of life.

So to recap – she taught us to believe in ourselves, gave us unconditional love, and did it all with a sense of humor. Man, she really SHOULD have her own blog. Maybe even a book.

Happy Mother’s Day, Mom. I love you!